How We Survived Two Funerals of Close Family
Life has a way of bringing seasons we never expect and sometimes those seasons feel impossibly heavy. For our family, one of the hardest times we’ve ever faced was walking through two funerals of close family members in less than a month.
It felt overwhelming, heartbreaking and at times almost too much to carry. Yet, somehow, step by step, we made it through. In this post, I want to share not only our story but also some gentle encouragement and practical tips for anyone navigating grief, multiple losses or the emotional weight of planning funerals while your heart is breaking. Because if you’re here reading this, chances are you may be walking through something similar and I want you to know, you are not alone.
The Shock of Losing Two Loved Ones So Close Together
Losing one loved one is devastating. Losing two in the span of weeks felt almost unbearable.
We were already trying to process the first loss when we got the news of the second. The grief stacked on top of itself and the weight of it left us feeling drained. Emotionally, mentally and physically.
On top of the sadness, there were also the practical demands of funerals:
- Making arrangements
- Organizing family gatherings
- Managing costs
- Supporting other grieving relatives
It was exhausting. And yet, in the middle of the hardest days, there were small moments that helped us keep moving forward.
What Helped Us Get Through
Looking back now, there are a few things that truly helped us survive such a painful season. If you’re in a place of grief right now, I hope these will bring you comfort or give you some ideas to lean on.
1. Leaning on Community Support – We quickly realized we couldn’t do everything on our own. Family offered support and brought food as well as stepped in to help with childcare. These gestures big and small lifted a huge weight off our shoulders.
If you’re grieving, let people help you. Say “Yes” to the meal, the ride, the offer to sit with you. Community care matters more than you realize.
2. Keeping Funeral Planning Simple – Funerals can feel overwhelming especially when you’re dealing with more than one. We gave ourselves permission to keep things simple. Not everything had to be perfect or extravagant. What mattered most was honoring our loved ones in a way that felt true to them.
If you’re facing funeral planning during grief, focus on meaning, not perfection. Small touches. A favorite song, a memory shared are what people remember most.
3. Allowing Ourselves to Grieve Differently – Grief doesn’t look the same for everyone. Some days we cried nonstop. Other days we felt numb. Sometimes we laughed at old memories and then felt guilty for laughing.
We had to remind ourselves. There is no “right” way to grieve. Giving ourselves permission to feel what we felt, moment by moment was important.
If you’re grieving, release the pressure to “do it right.” Your grief is valid exactly as it is.
4. Managing Finances Through Loss – The reality is funerals are expensive. Having two so close together stretched us thin. We had to have some honest conversations about budgeting for funeral costs and where to cut back.
We found that being transparent with family and setting financial boundaries early helped reduce stress. We focused on what mattered most. A meaningful goodbye, instead of feeling pressured to spend beyond what we could afford.
Tip: If you’re preparing for the future, even a small emergency fund can ease some of the financial stress of unexpected events like funerals.
5. Finding Comfort in Faith and Rituals – For us, leaning on our faith brought peace and grounding. Whether it was prayer, scripture or the comfort of familiar rituals. Those moments gave us something steady to hold onto when everything else felt uncertain.
Even if faith isn’t your path, grounding rituals like journaling, lighting a candle or creating a memory space can provide healing during grief.
6. Taking Care of Ourselves (Even in Small Ways) – Grief is exhausting and it’s easy to forget basic self care. Some days, all we managed was eating a simple meal, resting for a bit or taking a short walk. And that was enough.
If you’re grieving, don’t underestimate small acts of self care. Even the basics – food, water, rest help your body and mind endure the weight of loss.
Lessons We Learned Along the Way
As painful as that season was, we walked away with a few lessons we’ll carry for life:
- Life is fragile, and time with loved ones is precious. Don’t wait to say the things that matter.
- Grief comes in waves. Some days are harder than others and that’s okay.
- Support makes a difference. You don’t have to carry everything alone.
- Funerals are about meaning, not money. Simple, heartfelt goodbyes matter more than anything fancy.
- It’s okay to move forward slowly. Healing takes time and that’s exactly how it should be.
Final Thoughts: You Are Not Alone
Walking through two funerals so close together was one of the hardest chapters of our lives. It tested our strength, our faith and our ability to keep going. But it also reminded us of the resilience we didn’t know we had. And the power of love and community in the face of grief.
If you’re navigating loss right now, I hope this post reminds you that:
– You are not alone.
– You don’t have to do everything perfectly.
– One step at a time is enough.
Grief is a journey not something you simply “get over.” But little by little, you will find your way forward. And your loved ones’ memories will always walk with you.
